oh, ghastly lover, stay with me tonight
though I've not seen your face,
you haunt me in spite

my eyes can find no tears for you
they've dried long ago... wasted
[wasted on boys and simple iniquities]

I've hung myself from a thread
...twisted and twirling, like a waltz...

don't you love me now?
won't you ask me in a whisper:
"How can you feel so sad?
You're so beautiful, my dear.
Why won't you raise your eyes to the sky?
I know you're dying to try..."

yes... I'm dying to try
[and trying to feel]

I promise I'll smile for you soon

there's a craving in my lungs for something more than air
because sentiment is my oxygen
they've tried everything to keep me breathing,
but nothing ever lasts

I choke on it and I choke it down
there goes my illusion...
"I'll smile for you soon... yes, I'll smile for you soon..."

and I hate my dreams
they won't ever let me fall
they won't ever let me breathe
they won't ever let me live

dreams are dreams...
let's dream of something more precise
something more than a feeling
[something more like dying]